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The Zone: Life, and Death.

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  07:15:25  29 November 2008
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HL2 Master
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On forum: 06/28/2008
Messages: 271
Yeah Lucan, I like all of your stories and I'm not going to bash you in any way, shape or form...But why do you feel the need to point out
"inaccuracies" in Psynexus' story...? I mean it IS FAN FICTION after all, so it is FICTION...

You even said your self he has a good story leave it at that..... if you want to talk realism talk about the STALKER games, in real life if you are filled with 7.62 rounds, you cant just press the "]" key and administer a med kit..... so why do stories based of of the game need to get technical?

Thes stories are the print versionof Hollywood for us fans... and Hollywood is Fake and Fun, so lets keep fan fiction that way...

Oh by the way Lucan, Im likeing your new story.

HL2
  19:32:16  29 November 2008
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Lucan
Sup
(Resident)

 

 
On forum: 11/13/2007
 

Message edited by:
Lucan
11/29/2008 19:44:09
Messages: 759
No, some of the innacuraces are inexcuasable. It's fiction, not fantasy. It is impossible to man a tank alone. One rocket will not knock out a BTR-80, nor a Mi-24/35 (usually). There is no such thing as an AKS-74S. You can't just go "LOL BUT IT'S A GOOD STORY" and ignore everything else, that's just a sign you know you're wrong. My biggest beefs with this piece are listed above. And some of the people that are alive... Gremlin should be dead. Unless we get a reaaaaaallllly good explination for why he isn't.


---QUOTATION---
I see some corrections in need of correction.

Secondly, there is no such thing as an AK-74S. I am assuming you meant the AKS-74U.
Why not the AKS-74?

Thirdly, neathier Hinds nor MI-17s have gatling guns.
The Mi-24's standard gun used to be the Yakushev-Borzov 12.7mm, which is indeed a four-barreled Gatling gun. The newer models tend to carry heavier Gryazev-Shipunov 23mm and 30mm cannon, but all the Hinds seen in-game use the Yak-B.

And the theory of most of the RPG shots getting through the APCs and IFVs is wistful at best.
I wouldn't be so sure of that, what with the ammunition available now - since current rounds like the PG-7VR are rated for use against modern tanks, there's not much chance an APC would survive a hit in the right place.
---END QUOTATION---



I see some corrections to my corrections in need of corrections.

(Uh oh, vicious cycle.)

"Why not the AKS-74?"

He stated it was a shorter version. The AKS-74 is no shorter than the AK-74 or AK-74M, only lighter. It also has a collapsable stock, but so does the AK-74M, so it's only advantage over that is weight.

"...not much chance an APC would survive a hit in the right place"

True. But what are the chances Freedom soldiers know that place, and have the ability to hit it every time? Not bloody likely. If it was an ambush, and they had time to set up for every shot, then it would be a little more plausible.

"...Yak-B..."

Oh crap, you're right about that one. I've never seen one up close, so it always looked like a single barreled cannon to me. Eathier that or I've never seen the old Hind models.
  22:33:42  29 November 2008
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Psynexus
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On forum: 04/15/2007
 

Message edited by:
Psynexus
11/30/2008 6:04:37
Messages: 490
Lucan

Thanks for pointing out every inaccuracy in my story. Now I'll remind you that it is, in fact, a story - and based off of a fictional game at that. Obviously there are going to be inaccuracies given that's it written by someone who was only in the military for a few months before going AWOL - but that's not the point. The point is, I write the story as I go - and if I stopped every few seconds to make sure I got every little detail right, my creative flow would be disrupted.

Don't get me wrong though, I DO do my research. It's not like I'm saying helicopters fire bananas or anything stupid like that. If you wanna talk facts - here's a fact for you. Everything I write about is at least POSSIBLE even if not PLAUSIBLE. Freedom boys have a lot of time in the Zone, why can't they make their own tank-mounted explosive with an automatic trigger system for an already-loaded shell? You can sure as shit take out a helicopter if the exterior doors are wide open. If you had the amount of down-time they did and you were ex-military, you might have your own little Area 51 by that point in time.

I don't mind that you pointed out some small inaccuracies, but the way in which you did it made you sound like a complete dick. So for future reference, if you you see something you don't agree with - do one of these things.

1. Let me know in a constructive manner about what you disagree with, and why.
2. Shut the fuck up about it before you make an ass of yourself on the forums.
3. Write your own damn story.

I have an answer for anything in my story, but there is some information I haven't given away. But as far as facts go - there's only so much detail you can put it in when you're listening to mostly audio logs. Also, if I told you exactly how every little thing happened, you'd get bored and it would distract from the flow of the story.

Thanks for your input.
  05:09:16  30 November 2008
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hmmv50cal
(Novice)
 
On forum: 09/18/2008
Messages: 14

---QUOTATION---
Holy Fucking Shit! - Day 7 - Entry 4 -[Draft]!

Hey! It's that one guy who writes that one story!

Due to your ever-increasing bitching and moaning, I've finally found the time to start writing the next part again.

---END QUOTATION---



I knew we were getting somewhere!

@Lucas or Mr. Factual man
No. Story > facts.

kthxbai.
  18:32:11  30 November 2008
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Lucan
Sup
(Resident)

 

 
On forum: 11/13/2007
Messages: 759

---QUOTATION---
Lucan

Thanks for pointing out every inaccuracy in my story. Now I'll remind you that it is, in fact, a story - and based off of a fictional game at that. Obviously there are going to be inaccuracies given that's it written by someone who was only in the military for a few months before going AWOL - but that's not the point. The point is, I write the story as I go - and if I stopped every few seconds to make sure I got every little detail right, my creative flow would be disrupted.

Don't get me wrong though, I DO do my research. It's not like I'm saying helicopters fire bananas or anything stupid like that. If you wanna talk facts - here's a fact for you. Everything I write about is at least POSSIBLE even if not PLAUSIBLE. Freedom boys have a lot of time in the Zone, why can't they make their own tank-mounted explosive with an automatic trigger system for an already-loaded shell? You can sure as shit take out a helicopter if the exterior doors are wide open. If you had the amount of down-time they did and you were ex-military, you might have your own little Area 51 by that point in time.

I don't mind that you pointed out some small inaccuracies, but the way in which you did it made you sound like a complete dick. So for future reference, if you you see something you don't agree with - do one of these things.

1. Let me know in a constructive manner about what you disagree with, and why.
2. Shut the fuck up about it before you make an ass of yourself on the forums.
3. Write your own damn story.

I have an answer for anything in my story, but there is some information I haven't given away. But as far as facts go - there's only so much detail you can put it in when you're listening to mostly audio logs. Also, if I told you exactly how every little thing happened, you'd get bored and it would distract from the flow of the story.

Thanks for your input.
---END QUOTATION---





1. Yes, I was wrong about the Yak-B. Sorry about that, I didn't realise it was a Gattling, it has always appeared to be a cannon to me.
2. I have written stories. Even if I hadn't, that doesn't matter, considerign how completly un-related that is. Critiscism if critiscism, wether it's from another writer or not.
3. I think I was pretty clear about why I disagree with some of the factual holes in your story.
4. I doubt I will shut up. If the facts improve I will, otherwise I will continue to bitch. The story, with the exception of some of the living people, is great. Why do you think I gave it 9/10?
5. No, helicopers do not explode in mid air if you get a shot in the cargo. Not with an RPG-7. Yes, everyone dies and it crashes to the ground where it will probably be ripped apart, but it doesn't explode in mid air. The RPG-7 is not a Strella or a Stinger.
6. So you're saying Freedom can make a one man tank, when the best armored vehicle and military producers in the world can not? lol.
7. Okay, as long as the answer for Gremlin being alive is damn good, I'm fine.
8. Still waiting for an answer as to why the Hinds didn't use their rockets. In STALKER they are certaintly farrrr from reluctant too. And I'm pretty sure the pilots would have enough common sense to know that big base=ripe for rocket runs.
9. If I look like a dick, I look like a dick. I'm not trying to be nice. Surley that's gotten through.
10. The Zone is basically Area 51, no? I'm sure Freedom has their cache of tanks and Hinds that no one has any idea how the hell to operate.
11. As for the "point out every little detail", then, yes, most people probably would, but some wouldn't. So I appreciate your decision.
  22:19:31  30 November 2008
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Psynexus
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On forum: 04/15/2007
Messages: 490
Lucan

I'll take your post as constructively as possible. The answer to some of your questions will be answered and I MIGHT revise some of the Freedom fight scene since you seem to have the most problem with that.

Just know that I've never gotten along well with people who come off as know-it-alls and you can continue to point out every flaw if you want but I'll keep writing the story the way I want to.

Just remember that the point of the story is the adventure and philosophical aspect, not the technical side (although that is also important). So there are bound to be a few factual holes every once in a while and I'm doing my best not to let that happen.
  00:34:07  1 December 2008
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Lucan
Sup
(Resident)

 

 
On forum: 11/13/2007
Messages: 759
Every once in a while?

You're up there for understatement of the year.

But, be more careful about what you write. Yes, it's not all technical, admittedly, but it doesn't seem like technical things matter at all you sometimes.

Also, what did Nimbus mean when he saw the SPAS-12 in the millitary?
  03:32:45  1 December 2008
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Psynexus
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On forum: 04/15/2007
Messages: 490
Lucan

Technical things do matter to me, but when you've already written 250+ pages there's bound to be inaccuracies. My fucking bad.

If you want to correct every little technical detail, do it in a way that doesn't bash the story - otherwise you'll understand if I don't take your "advice" to heart.

Otherwise, the only advice I can offer as an author to a read is - if you don't like the way I write it, stop reading it.
  03:42:20  1 December 2008
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Psynexus
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On forum: 04/15/2007
 

Message edited by:
Psynexus
12/01/2008 3:52:14
Messages: 490
The Zone: Life and Death - Day 8

It's here! It's finally here!

http://www.randombs.net/thezone/diary/day_8.php

As you know, this one was a long time in the making. My down-time has given me ample time to reflect on what I've written so far and approach it with renewed inspiration.

I hope you enjoy it!

EDIT: Note that "Day 8" is the edited title of "Day 7 Entry 4" (I lost track of time and forgot another day had rolled though already).
  05:31:16  1 December 2008
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HL2 Master
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On forum: 06/28/2008
 

Message edited by:
HL2 Master
12/01/2008 6:31:34
Messages: 271
BRILLIANT! A true work of ART!!!

Also the revised Reaper is pefect, you have added details, that are SO true, yet I neglected to mention, like where he blanky stares at the floor for a second, and forgets, I am terrible for that...and the creepiness toward Enigma... thats great!

The character is spot on!!!! Keep up the EXCELLENT Work!!!!!!!!!!
"Reaper: Well… lucky for them I brought my favorite toy with me – meet “Blood-fucker” you bloody chavs!"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HL2
 
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