ProjectsWhat's NewDownloadsCommunitySupportCompany
Forum Index » S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl Forum » Stalker stories
Did I submit my story correctly? Here it is.

« Previous 10 events | 1 2 3 | Next 10 events »| All Messages
Posted by/on
Question/AnswerMake Oldest Up Sort by Ascending
  07:39:29  26 May 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
Amoki
back with a vengeance
(V.I.P.)

 

 
On forum: 07/31/2003
Messages: 1729

---QUOTATION---
Woah! Thanks for the advice Probably one of the best sources of information is forums, if you ask the right people. Im not quite sure I understand your entire Aussie-kiwi reference.... are you australian and making fun of the newzealanders by calling them kiwi's? Thats the only conclusion I've managed to come up with.
I personally get a huge kick out of writing, but I havn't really tried anything THAT ambitious and actually gone through with it. If I write a story on my own, it almost NEVER gets finished (Im really bad at not planning the ending before I start writing... BAD HABIT). My best (by that I mean finished ) work involves a deadline of some kind (ie contests, english projects etc.) I do hope I'll eventually manage to over come this rather irritating flaw of mine. Maybe a course in writing or something to help me develop a plan would help...
Thanks again for your advice.

Btw, I am 16 (Grade 11), but like I was alluding too earlier, our school system (or society for that matter) doesn't cover practically ANY history that doesn't involve Canada or North America. It is really too bad that my society remains fairly ignorant to alot of things that have happened in the past, simply because they are related with a less influential country.

Oh an Chansd5, I'm glad you like what you see so far, and I hope you enjoy the rest if you get a chance to read it!
---END QUOTATION---



16... hmmm. About the age I write joining the contest.

Actually, I came from MAlaysia, but now reside and study at New Zealand. That thing si only a brother-to-brother kind of thing- the big brother always 'bully' the smaller brother, even though both come to the same parents. Aussie can start a joke on anything about New Zealand from our sheep (chode) to The lord of the Ring Films (a columnist in sydney Herald Tribune). As I say again, it is a brother-to-brother business again, not something that could start a civil war. It is just like how the Americans, your cousins, starts a joke like" Canadian could have ended up with British Culture, French Cuisine, and American techonology. Instead, they ended up with American culture, French Technology, and British Cuisine (British Cuisine is lousy in the eyes of French by the way). Oh, BTW, kiwis are New Zealander.

As for your habit of procrastination, just bear in mind that only you can help yourself. Put in lots of interest in your work, and you don't have to worry about lagging behind your schedule. But people differ from everyone- most of us work best with deadline anyway.

As for the right people? Heh, , just trying to help those newbies to their feet. When I started, there is only one guy who helped me (and he only read 1o pages of my work_, who happens to be the guy who started the thread about writing stories in this forum. So just trying to give something back.
  06:04:04  26 May 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
FranzInc
(Novice)
 
On forum: 04/27/2004
 

Message edited by:
FranzInc
05/26/2004 7:08:42
Messages: 29
Woah! Thanks for the advice Probably one of the best sources of information is forums, if you ask the right people. Im not quite sure I understand your entire Aussie-kiwi reference.... are you australian and making fun of the newzealanders by calling them kiwi's? Thats the only conclusion I've managed to come up with.
I personally get a huge kick out of writing, but I havn't really tried anything THAT ambitious and actually gone through with it. If I write a story on my own, it almost NEVER gets finished (Im really bad at not planning the ending before I start writing... BAD HABIT). My best (by that I mean finished ) work involves a deadline of some kind (ie contests, english projects etc.) I do hope I'll eventually manage to over come this rather irritating flaw of mine. Maybe a course in writing or something to help me develop a plan would help...
Thanks again for your advice.

Btw, I am 16 (Grade 11), but like I was alluding too earlier, our school system (or society for that matter) doesn't cover practically ANY history that doesn't involve Canada or North America. It is really too bad that my society remains fairly ignorant to alot of things that have happened in the past, simply because they are related with a less influential country.

Oh an Chansd5, I'm glad you like what you see so far, and I hope you enjoy the rest if you get a chance to read it!
  08:21:45  24 May 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
Amoki
back with a vengeance
(V.I.P.)

 

 
On forum: 07/31/2003
Messages: 1729

---QUOTATION---
Wow, thanks for the HUGE comment . Im really pleased that someone liek yourself took the time to think about what I wrote and seriously evaluate it. Boy, after you point out the things wrong with the story it seems so obvious! Its too bad I can't edit it and resubmit it, cause I have already thought of a bunch of things I'd love to add. Cause thats what I get for leaving things to the last minute. I didn't know about this GAME, let alone the contest, until late January.
Thanks for your compliments on the characters. I had a great time creating and writing about them, glad to see someone else enjoy them as well.
I wish I had alot more time to put the reserch into the story. Some of the reasons the great novels I have read are so great are because the research involved is top-notch. I had to mostly rely on my current knowledge of the subjects I touched upon in the story, which isnt much Im afraid. Being a grade 11 student in Canada means I know practially NOTHING about the area of Chernobyl. I didn't even know what country Chernobyl was in! THanks for your constructive critizim (sp?), I think knowing my strengths and weaknesses will help me alot the next time I write. I do believe you, Amoki, would make a good editor.
Thanks Again.
---END QUOTATION---



To be honest, research isn't really that daunting, you know. Research is important, yes, but that is only about 20% importance in a story, although when you come to the final stage of selecting the best of the best stories that 20% mattered between heaven and earth. What is more important is style- how you put an ordinary sentence into one that sounded complex and sophisticated, yet enjoyable to read. Being Grade 11 (how old is that? Guess not around 16, since people around that age will already be exposed to Chernobyl), you can practise writing, but writing age with maturity- don't expect to write like Ian_C or most people in this forum after you write 2 or three pieces. But keep on the practice.

Most of the time, writing not need to be that obvious. Research differs between WHAT you want to write. If you wish to continue writing, read on. But if you don't, I suggest you quit this thread now

Like my "Home to stay", it is more intended on the thinking side and feeling side, so research is needed minimally. For example, I only need to find out what brand of cigarrettes that is popular in Ukraine, a farmland's pirce and the area in Ukraine where soil is the most fertile, location of my setting (real setting available in map), and the currency use in Ukraine and its convertion rate IT is not that daunting, only a few key words here and there and you get what you want.

Of course, localisation would be a little bit complex. Localisation means imitating local accent, slangs, etc. So far only one person managed to do so writing in this contest: Midnight Rambler and his "Inhuman condition", where his imitation of Scottish accent was close to real. So since you came from Canada, use what is of your countries. Donlt cross the line. For example, a writer named "Matthew De Piazzi" (:l) in the competition did something stupid like imitating New Zealand slang when it comes to name, using "Crustopher" instead of "Kristopher" while trying to joke how Kiwis say their name. Just another round in the great Aussie-and-Kiwi boxing match. Some of this day, I could probably something that mocks Aussies once and for all.

However, if you decided to go for action that relies heavily on weaponary, close-quarter combat, ammunition etc., research is needed HEAVILY!. Like when I did my "Prey of one, Predator of another" series months ago, I threw question at a gun nut in the forum name X5060 who knew almost everything about guns, from how a 40mm grenade works to weaponary attachment. Never trust anything from what you see in games-most games made things sounded so easy. For example, in real life not a lot of people use pistols akimbo style like what happened in Tomb Raider. That way of firing reduce gun accuracy and waste ammunition. Not exactly the things you want to happen in "One shot, one kill" environment. But hey, when you need help, just ask the guys in "Gameplay and Balance" section, that guy is there. Oh, if you want to know, the thread asking for answers last for about a month and 10 pages
  01:22:57  24 May 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
Chansd5
(Senior)
 
On forum: 11/26/2003
Messages: 124
Wow wow wow, from the time I had I read a bit of it and of what I could and I caught a few action parts of it and it seems to be very very entertaining.. I would read it next time I have free time maybe tomorrow and give you a nice verdict Franz
  00:30:17  24 May 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
FranzInc
(Novice)
 
On forum: 04/27/2004
Messages: 29
Wow, thanks for the HUGE comment . Im really pleased that someone liek yourself took the time to think about what I wrote and seriously evaluate it. Boy, after you point out the things wrong with the story it seems so obvious! Its too bad I can't edit it and resubmit it, cause I have already thought of a bunch of things I'd love to add. Cause thats what I get for leaving things to the last minute. I didn't know about this GAME, let alone the contest, until late January.
Thanks for your compliments on the characters. I had a great time creating and writing about them, glad to see someone else enjoy them as well.
I wish I had alot more time to put the reserch into the story. Some of the reasons the great novels I have read are so great are because the research involved is top-notch. I had to mostly rely on my current knowledge of the subjects I touched upon in the story, which isnt much Im afraid. Being a grade 11 student in Canada means I know practially NOTHING about the area of Chernobyl. I didn't even know what country Chernobyl was in! THanks for your constructive critizim (sp?), I think knowing my strengths and weaknesses will help me alot the next time I write. I do believe you, Amoki, would make a good editor.
Thanks Again.
  10:38:44  22 May 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
Amoki
back with a vengeance
(V.I.P.)

 

 
On forum: 07/31/2003
Messages: 1729
Well, I'll just give you an introduction of myself. I am amoki. I am a male. I am a word nut. I currently have the most works in the contest. My works are almost totally junk as not many people read them. I have read all the stories in the contest. I am here to give you a comment.

Now, attahoy to your story.

Your story is actually good, among the goodies of the contest of the story. YOur plot is definitely interesting, and hey, it is actually been a while since I read something entertaining without whine.

But... I have comments.
1) British? Definitely illogical. The friendly British people taking The Zone? Even so, Ukraine is in the Eastern Europe, but UK is at the west. And I don;t think Ukraine and UK ever meet in terms of geography. UK is surrounded by sea and France, Ukraine is by CIS countries.
2) Obviously, you didnt' do your research in your story, but for once I can forgive you because your story entertained me. You can't see the evidence of transgenic transplant just by dissceting the organ, can you? Another thing is... a Ukrainian using a Smith and Wesson? S&W is an American weapon. You should put an emphasis on either Russian weapons or weapons in the website of the game.


Not much from me, but lots of compliments to me.

To be completely honest, you storty is more invigorating than "He who dares wins" Series. For one, you manage to create good and distinctive characterization, a feature not a lot of people willing to spent time on, yet somehow wished their story would win the contest? *sigh*. If you have not been following the forum in recent months, chracterization is putting life into your characters- feelings, emotions, reaction. You guys have easily identifiable characterization- an "actor" military officer with racial sentiments , a eccentrical British scientist (kinda remind me of my British Physic teacher and his behaviour . But somehow I detect no chracterization in your main character, aside that he is a hero... btu I can't blame you. This is probably your first piece. Your story is also, as Ian_C put it, easy to read. But of course, having a good night's sleep could have done more magic

On the contrary, "He who dares wins" has everything correct, down to a point that the author's knowledge of weaponary surpass ordinary gun knowledge (down to a point the author TELLS THE EXACT BULLET he wants) and only X5060 can understand. But his characterization is purely physical i.e concrete.- readers probably find it hard to go deep into his character. Sure, his main character is Austrian SAS ( Why not NZSAS ) [and another character is a physicist (and the author's knowledge of physics is superb, sure signs of research)] and he knows guns, but he had no life principals. No goals. No clear history, nothing that drives him. His character can't be predicted, which is very contrast to yours. we only knew his character by conversation and minor flashback. Yours? By means of action and facial expression. Highly commendable.

Looks like another candidate for The Verdict, eh

Overall? Good job. You could have improve well if you had started early and follow the guideline for writing a story as given at the top of the thread, but as the saying goes, it is hard to put down top-notch thing and last-minute's notice. Anyway, do continue your interest to write.
  02:39:22  22 May 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
FranzInc
(Novice)
 
On forum: 04/27/2004
Messages: 29
YAA! Thanks a million for giving me the heads up! That makes me very very happy! Glad to see that staying up till three on a school night was NOT in vain.
  08:29:07  13 May 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
Amoki
back with a vengeance
(V.I.P.)

 

 
On forum: 07/31/2003
Messages: 1729
Hey, Franz, your work got posted! I think I can read them soon enough and give you a comment. And Congrats, you made it into the contest.
  22:31:08  30 April 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
FranzInc
(Novice)
 
On forum: 04/27/2004
 

Message edited by:
FranzInc
04/30/2004 22:34:33
Messages: 29

---QUOTATION---
oh man, this is mumble jumble. I really can' t read it now, maybe some other day when I can reedit and put tabs on. Not insulting you, but... it is really hard to enjoy a messy stuff like that.
---END QUOTATION---


Ya, know exactly what you mean. I wrote the story in Word, but when I posted it here, the tabs (or italics for that matter) didn't copy over. I couldnt figure out how to tab things in (pushing tab just selects another link on the screen) without repeatedly pushing space, which I didn't have time for then. Too bad I can't edit it now...

Btw, Ian C, Thanks for the resource on Brit sayings!
  14:33:11  30 April 2004
profilee-mailreply Message URLTo the Top
Ian_C
The man lacking a plan
(V.I.P.)

 

 
On forum: 08/02/2003
Messages: 273
If you amended 'smartass' to 'smartarse' ( pretty much what has been done entirely over here with the U.S orig 'ass' so....'arsehole' for example ) then you'd be pretty safe.

Hoodlum sounds a bit like something a retired Military Colonel complete with handlebar moustache might come up with, not sure about that one.

So yeah, stuff like 'smartarse prick' is pretty safe.

What a great discussion this is.
 
Each word should be at least 3 characters long.
Search:    
Search conditions:    - spaces as AND    - spaces as OR   
 
Forum Index » S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl Forum » Stalker stories
 

All short dates are in Month-Day-Year format.


 

Copyright © 1995-2021 GSC Game World. All rights reserved.
This site is best viewed in Internet Explorer 4.xx and up and Javascript enabled. Webmaster.
Opera Software products are not supported.
If any problem concerning the site functioning under Opera Software appears apply
to Opera Software technical support service.