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Snork bait (feedback)

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Question/AnswerMake Oldest Up Sort by Ascending
  22:57:34  23 September 2009
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Do0mzday-Jesus
Senior Resident
 

 
On forum: 09/01/2009
Messages: 211
That was awesome.
  22:52:37  23 September 2009
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snorkbait
Nexus 6
(Resident)

 

 
On forum: 11/21/2008
Messages: 1081

---QUOTATION---
HL2 Master: Er...not tonight. I'm still writing the next chapter!

-=grunt=- & HL2M: Still a long way to go yet. You'd better hope I don't get hit by a bus or something before I post the last chapter.

"Last chaapter"? Surely there is more than one left? I thought this was going to be a long on going story...

HL2
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Er...looks like you misunderstood.
Yeah, there's a lot more story to come before the last chapter. It's nowhere near the end. I just meant 'before it's all done'.
  20:04:50  23 September 2009
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HL2 Master
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On forum: 06/28/2008
Messages: 271

---QUOTATION---
HL2 Master: Er...not tonight. I'm still writing the next chapter!

-=grunt=- & HL2M: Still a long way to go yet. You'd better hope I don't get hit by a bus or something before I post the last chapter.
---END QUOTATION---



"Last chaapter"? Surely there is more than one left? I thought this was going to be a long on going story...

HL2
  19:01:20  23 September 2009
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snorkbait
Nexus 6
(Resident)

 

 
On forum: 11/21/2008
Messages: 1081
HL2 Master: Er...not tonight. I'm still writing the next chapter!

-=grunt=- & HL2M: Still a long way to go yet. You'd better hope I don't get hit by a bus or something before I post the last chapter.
  18:55:53  23 September 2009
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HL2 Master
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On forum: 06/28/2008
Messages: 271
Certainly not full yet, this chapter was good. May we have another, tonight perhaps....
  18:31:00  23 September 2009
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-=Grunt=-
Cake Muncher
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On forum: 01/08/2009
Messages: 4114
Om nom nom nom.. Snorkbait is feeding us well with all the chapters.

But were not full yet.
  18:24:52  23 September 2009
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HL2 Master
Senior Resident
 

 
On forum: 06/28/2008
Messages: 271
Another chapter! Woot! Cant wait to read it!

HL2
  23:26:35  22 September 2009
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snorkbait
Nexus 6
(Resident)

 

 
On forum: 11/21/2008
Messages: 1081

---QUOTATION---
And the anwer just like it.
AND i forgot to run spellcheck
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Oh. Good. I'll look forward to reading that, then. *weeps quietly*

psynexus: Well...it's convenient for all sides. Plus there's some mileage in it yet. Maybe the rooks will get the L.85s, perhaps a couple of Dragunovs...or maybe not.
  22:25:35  22 September 2009
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Psynexus
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On forum: 04/15/2007
Messages: 490

---QUOTATION---
on game connections

[Just to be clear: the following, i assure you, is based on the fact that i find "the big picture" enjoyable enough to pick on details.]

I'll try to be a bit constructive now; it will be partially general musing (about all fanfiction) but it concerns this story specifically as well.
I've only started to discover the "Stories" section in last few months and only gone through 3 or 4 projects in this time.

There's one nagging thought about story-game connections that applies to every single piece i've read here.
- Describing landscapes, scenery, important locations, etc using the ingame geography - excellent, it really helps to explore those places in one's mind.
- the "background" charachters such as traders, squad leaders and so on taking a role int he story (and often reflecting the steps in the beginning of a new game) - fine; creates a nice point of reference and sort of brings the 'What-cinderella-does-on-her-day-off" kind of dimension to the story, as well as the game).
- mutants, gadgets, gear, items - describing them as seen in the games and adding one's own twists to it - super, it all helps to dig in to the story.
All of the above works well and helps the story along.

And then...
for some reason, when any of you (no exception, i've had the same reaction in all the stories i've otherwise enjoyed) brings up the protagonist of either game it feels like a cold shower (not as in "refreshing" but as in "turnoff" ). If the story already was about one of the protagonists or his friends, i wouldn't mind, it would be a different kind of story then.
But if here we've got a unique piece with its own characters and its own logic, pace, goals and so on... (basically, a piece of writing that is already great in its own merit) then each time a game's main character's name pops up, i go, like - "WHY?".
It feels so unnecesary.

(Hope it was constructive)

(ED: fixed the unintentional smug smiley)
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Agreed with the good points, I do the same thing in my stories (especially with the twists on characters and mutants).

I understand where you're coming from on the protagonist issue. I myself am working to make stories that not only the Stalker community understands, but a normal reader with no idea of what the game is can read and understand. So in that regard, when a name like Marked One or Scar is thrown in like they're Jesus I get a little irked myself. I think snorkbait used it well in that it does set a time-frame and it was a little detail that a normal reader would just pass up as another name whereas a Stalker player would catch the reference.

With that said, another good read. But if I may; fuck those military fucks! They can shove their alliance up their ass! "D
  20:15:35  22 September 2009
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hhiker
off to new worlds
(Resident)

 

 
On forum: 10/31/2008
Messages: 4290

---QUOTATION---


ED: You should have mail. Long, rambling, possibly pointless mail.
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And the anwer just like it.
AND i forgot to run spellcheck
 
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